The
Patients
Tangiers
Mausim
Fridge
Alex Kazam vs Danny Trombone
Christiana
The Creeping Nobodies
Folk Festival Massacre
The Waxmannequin
THE
PATIENTS
WAVELENGTH #84 Sunday October 7, 11:30pm
Purveyors of: Whatever happened to '80s college-rock?
Pictured: Stu Stout
We asked Buddy 1078 to interview Stu Stout of The Patients. He called up Stu, got wasted and forced Stu to watch Stripes. We're considering the first ever Wavelength layoff.
Stu: You know, for continuity in street shots in movies, they hose down the street every time so the streets are wet and glistening. Don't ask me how I know that, but it's true.
Buddy: How much Ivan Reitman is there to your band?
Stu: Oh, uh, shit, we're serious about what we do... how should I interpret that? 50 percent. Bill Murray's a class act... (pointing at screen) That's what you can think of The Patients as. An urban assault vehicle... "Where the fuck's my truck?!?" It's a big challenge to fill up 30 minutes and have some cohesion, to make the songs seem bigger than they are. We fool people with stop/start tricks so they can't tell that we don't rehearse. Fuck, I dunno, it's hard to have a band, because I've got definite opinions, but at the end of the day, life's too short, it's my band.
Buddy: That's very Stripes of you.
Stu: More like autobiographical singer-songwriter. I'm not sure if I like it, but... John Denver doesn't mean it can't be thuggish!
Buddy: Hey, but cynicism can breed good music.
Stu: Oh, for sure, and I'm by no means humble, but I'm not gonna stand by and...
Buddy: ...not be critical.
Stu: It's hard to be a critic. As a musician you gotta have doubt in order to grow. I know I've done a good job and I don't need anybody to tell me cuz I know it.
Buddy: It's fuckin' sweet when they do tell you. "I like your songs! Lemme give you a blowjob!".. and that's 15 people you don't know...
Stu: Um... I haven't had the luxury of playing to a whole lotta people and having my confidence feed off that... I'm not thinking about the audience when I'm writing songs.
TANGIERS
WAVELENGTH #84 Sunday October 7, 10:30pm
Purveyors of: Warped pop romanticism minus the Romanticism
My
ears were caught unawares by the mighty Tangiers. And were these sounds
pleasing? O, soul, was I intoxicated by that which I did hear? Yes, yes,
yes, it is true, dear compatriot: I was smitten, verily. Come, dear countryman,
come. Come, dear woman, come. Come and hear for yourself! Wine is for
drinking and Tangiers are for hearing - enjoy the bounty while the season
is ripe.
- Paddy O'Donnell
Look, the drenched
mountains! So full, toppling with banshee cries and lamenting wizards.
The deep orbs of sunlight calming crowd cries for justice. That rock and
roll which charges back to the front... that's for you. A momentum never
lost, let's give it all or take it back. Backbones give it their sexy
push all over your pirate stump dance and newfound pants. Get those shoes
on, do the broken heart and snap up the suits. A throwback returned to
sender, the soul-music bounce which sees your trees and crumbling mountains
aching with love lost. Electricity unedited and tuned to wet lips and
spin-skirted hips. Dedicated to your nights and boners ALIVE!
love,
TANGIERS
MAUSIM
WAVELENGTH #84
Sunday October 7, 9:45pm
Purveyors of: Droney, improvised guitardation
Members: Gabe, Kevin, Troy, Tyler
What
does Mausim mean?
Many things to a few people.
How
did the band come about?
Summer of 1997. Four friends who wanted to create music. Problem: everyone
plays guitar. Solution: everyone plays guitar. We aspired to play without
the confines of structure or volume, but our only place to do so was a
basement apartment. However, we soon realized we could totally let it
rip because we didn't even sound like a band people would just think
it was someone's television turned to static, with the volume cranked
and the windows left open. Infinitely more socially acceptable than what
really went on. It became an entity of its own, and the sound became a
force that we merely guided and no one could control.
The
new disc has taken some time to come to fruition. Would you care to explain?
The first CD took three years to realize. The new disc took less than
a year in spite of various logistical issues I mean have you seen the
packaging? Available soon for the "masses".
How
would you guys describe the live sound of Mausim?
It is undescribable. It seems familiar but is always different, and like
most things in nature, it can get away from us. Rarely heard, barely seen,
this will be the third ever show in a four year history of confounding
listeners, audiences and record collectors.
What's
turning the krank in the house of Mausim?
The crank's not turning, the house is.
- interview by Zig Zag Wanderer
FRIDGE
WAVELENGTH #85 Sunday October 14, 11pm
Purveyors of:
You must be joking
e-mail: fridge100@hotmail.com
web: http://brainwashed.com/fridge
Since
the release of Ceefax in 1997, Fridge has been one of the most visible
and prolific of the U.K.'s quote-unquote post-rock bands. How do you guys
have the time to put out so many damn records?
The first couple of albums and EPs were written, recorded and produced
in a week, in Sam's bedroom, onto audio cassette. We would record in school
holidays, so our ideas would be bubbling away (though thinking back, we
never discussed them before starting to record). We'd cram into Sam's
room, put the bed on its end to make some more space, Trevor ("Output/Underdog/Playgroup
Jackson") would hire in any equipment we might need and we'd blurt out
the music. We believe in the First Take - why waste time playing the same
thing for two days when you could have started and finished another track
in that time? The releases have slowed down a lot since then. For Eph
we had a much more particular aim. We spent a couple of months getting
it right. We all found it pretty hard making a record over a long period
of time - our tastes and influences broaden so much in, say, the length
of time it took to make Happiness, that the music we made at the beginning
just wasn't relevant to us anymore. I can't understand how anyone could
be satisfied working on and churning out the same rubbish for years. You
gotta have faith in what you do, first time, for real.
Now
let's drive that post-rock thing into the ground one last time. I remember
reading about it in The Wire in '94. Simon Reynolds coined it succinctly
yet openly: basically any band that mixes electronics and/or ambient textures
with rock instrumentation could be considered "post-rock". Now, it just
means "bands that sound like Tortoise". What up with that? (And while
we're at it, how come everyone forgets about Bark Psychosis?)
Back when we started, we had no idea and frankly
couldn't care less about post-rock. We were a school band playing music
we liked. We were watching bands like Prolapse and Quickspace Supersport
and thought "this is good - a fifteen minute track, one chord, a chugging
beat (I hadn't heard the term "motorik" then) and the only words were
La-La", brilliant. We started to look to the roots of the music we were
loving. I never thought of Fridge as a post-rock band until the reviews
began. The bigger picture: In the beginning there was Post-Rock - the
idea. To us, this was about not being confined to any particular genre,
or more particularly, any particular influence. It also expounded the
use of studio-as-instrument and also a sort of sonic bravery, frontier-style.
A try-it-out mentality. Then came Post-Rock the sound. After a while,
a couple of groups came to the fore and stamped their sound on the name.
Then people started up bands based on their love of these records, trying
to sound like them (sorry, "being influenced by them"). This is where
it all began to go wrong - where was the innovation? The commitment to
ridiculously out-there ideas or techniques? All that was left was some
tinny high notes on a bass guitar, more's the pity.
The
music press seems to exert a stronger influence in the U.K. than it does
everywhere else, at least that's what we can tell from this side of the
pond. Does it drive you guys crazy having to deal with journalists' demands/expectations?
Or do you just say, "fuck those guys; they'll eat up whatever shit we
put out"? (Not to imply you put out "shite".)
We've always had excellent notices from the press.
It is the "free-est" way to let people know that your music is out and
is really good-go-and-buy-it-five-stars. Most journalists are lazy and
will crib from the press release anyhow, our only involvement being in
its writing. We take very little notice of the press, but exploit it to
the fullest. If you aim to please the press, you will fall flat on your
face. Make music for yourself and then your audience and the rest follows.
Are
you guys all seriously trained musicians or what? Aren't you all 12 and
like jazz-rock Mozarts or something?
No. It's a strange myth. We started pretty young,
but none of us were astounding at any instrument (though I must admit,
Kieran could do a mean Jimi Hendrix - knew all the solos). Sam, a trombonist,
had barely picked up a pair of sticks before we started. We all come from
fairly diverse musical backgrounds, and can play a fairly large amount
of instruments, fairly well. This, mixed with our willingness to mess
with structure, time signatures and rhythmic ideas seems to have lifted
us to virtuoso level (hasn't anyone listened to the playing on some of
those earlier records?). We've got much better over the years (you can
learn and practice a lot in years), but we're still a fair cry from the
legend-like genius some bestow upon us.
Do
you live in London? What is your neighbourhood like? Do the pubs still
close at five in the afternoon?
We all live in London. It is truly the greatest
city in all the world. It could do with being a little more "24/7", the
public transport is poor and roads are congested. It's dirty and polluted
and horribly over-priced but despite all this and plenty more, it holds
my heart. It is a fantastic place filled with so many contradictions that
it makes your head spin. Home to such an incredible amount of inspiration
and mindlessness, satisfaction and discontent, hope and despair all in
equal measure. The population of London is as varied as you could imagine
- cultures root and intertwine from all over the world, each stamped with
its own particular "London-ness", feeding into the history of the capitol.
All this pours into this writhing mass whose edge is constantly spreading
outward, absorbing more and more. Wonderful and terrible, perfect and
utterly flawed, I love London.
Why
do so few British bands like to Rock Out?
They try. They're just rubbish at it.
Why
is Tony Blair being so swift to lend George Dubya a hand in bombing Afghanistan
back to the Stone Age, which is where they basically are already?
I'd have thought that there'd be a number of reasons
as to why Blair supports the U.S. (not just Bush, but past and future
governments too) so whole-heartedly. Firstly, Britain believes it has
a "special relationship" with the U.S. Since the reunification of Germany,
Britain is no longer particularly the leading economy in Europe, nor need
it therefore be the leading political influence in Europe - now an "axis"
of France and Germany. Therefore if it can retain "special" links with
the world's most powerful nation, it can continue to retain powers well
above its station. A seat on the U.N. security council for example, and
membership of the G8. Trade rules and powers, keeping us all rich.
Secondly, it would be foolhardy for the U.K. not to offer the U.S. (in all likelihood) specialist assistance in the forthcoming conflict should the conflict escalate and Britain's territory become somehow directly involved. The U.S. has waged war on Britain's behalf before and would in all probability be unlikely to do so again should Britain not offer technical assistance as American lives are lost. The liberal left wing of Europe (ourselves included) can offer many arguments as to why American foreign policy contributed to the actions of September 11, but here sheer practicality almost certainly reigns. The liberal left wing likes to be kept in the manner it is accustomed to. It doesn't want itself destroyed.
Thirdly, Blair presents a strong front in war. He has a grave manner when it's required and a small, measured conflict - well-handled - will boost his status worldwide. He's a politician like many others, playing the power games that big boys get to play. There's a theory that all British men want to be Churchill.
Personally, we condemn both the WTC attacks and the subsequent (to come) attacks on the people of Afghanistan. Should U.S. or U.K. special forces be able to find and arrest/murder Osama bin Laden, the operation would seem a relative success, but this would almost certainly not be the end. Problems to be confronted include the sanctions on Iraq which must immediately be ended. The deaths of approximately one million Iraqi innocents should not go unnoted. Then the U.S. should pressure Israel to end the unlawful occupation of Palestinian lands. Finally, the U.S. and U.N. should commence massive infrastructure rebuilding aid to the peoples decimated by 50 years of instablity in the Middle East and beyond. This would then start to remove the inequalities that might have caused the problem the world currently faces.
Other problems may be the source, religious intolerance may even be one, but the issue of aid can be readily and directly addressed and it is this that must be tackled at once. The U.S. and U.K. are directly responsible for some of the most serious humanitarian issues that the world faces, it's time they bit their own bullets and chewed them up.
The
newest Fridge LP is called Happiness, which is also the title of a controversial
film by Todd Solondz. Needless to say, Happiness was not a Happy Movie.
Can the same be said about Happiness the album?
The title of the record has nothing to do with that film (which we all
thought was pretty good) or the Lisa Germano album (which I think is pretty
good) or anything else called Happiness. We liked it as a title for our
album. It fit. The record is a little melancholy, but in a nice way. A
fond memory, wistful yet uplifting etc. I hope that listening to this
record gives positive emotions. Call them Happiness if you like.
Happiness'
titles are dry and descriptive: "Cut Up Piano and Xylophone"; "Five Four
Child Voice", etc. Hey, does that make you guys "meta-rock", in that you
making music about making music? How about that, eh?
You're pretty astute. We've always made music that's about music. I think
that that might be a fundamental aspect of Fridge. People who know about
music have seemed to get more out of our records (except my Mum - she
only knows The Beatles and she loves our records loads). The titles were
the working titles while we recorded. We used to sit around for a day
after recording and name everything. When records came out, people would
often refer to them as "the one with trombone on it" or "the one that
goes" This way of naming tracks saves that. Nothing deeper, no message
to those that said our titles were too obtuse or meaningless
What
are the five most rockin' songs in 5/4? I'll add Slint's "Nosferatu Man"
just in case you forget it.
You must be joking.
Do
you guys know Dan "Manitoba" Snaith? He went to school with my old roomate's
ex-girlfriend's older brother.
Know him? We got him his record deal, made him the man he is today! We
met him at The Big Chill way back. He came over and said hi. A couple
of weeks later we were blown away by the demo he had sent and so it began.
We're hoping that Dan will join the band for our mini-tour of the UK.
He's a fantastic keys player as well as being a jazz-garage programmer
guru. There's a whole bunch of people in Dundas (Ontario) making some
fantastic music - you heard it here first. Just you wait.
Do
you guys ever record a song and then listen back and go, "how the fuck
are we going to play this bugger live?" If so, then how do you approach
it?
We never think about playing tracks live. When recording we do all sorts
of impossible stuff. We are only three, which would make a live recreation
of our record (if, indeed, we wanted to) possible only with the addition
of about ten extra musicians or a click track. We despise click tracks.
A drummer wearing headphones is lame. Where is the feel? What if you want
to play faster? Who wants to go to a gig and watch the band play music
exactly as it's played on the record? Lay in a dark room and put it on
headphones if you want to hear the record. We play live versions of tracks.
You'll notice a melody here, an idea there from this or that track. We
make loads up on the spot. It's not wishy-washy noodling, it's much harder,
more exciting and generally louder.
When
Adem, Kieran, Sam are hanging out and not playing music, what are you
guys most likely to be doing together?
The usual stuff. We eat chopped-up pork on rice. Kieran is often busy
trotting the globe with his internationally renowned Four Tet project.
Sam is often busy doing graphic design and web design. Adem (that's me)
whiles away his time making music for television and theatre while getting
together his solo music demos - get ready world. We are good at what we
do 'cause we do what we love.
- interview by Jonny Dovercourt
ALEX
KAZAM VS DANNY TROMBONE
WAVELENGTH #85 Sunday October 14, 10pm
Purveyors of:
The live dance cut-up and lock groove
Cedrumatic
played Wavelength. Tally Hum Orchestra played Wavelength. Now Alex Kazam
vs. Danny Trombone are set to play Wavelength. Explain this history and
expand to the present day.
It seems more of a tradition than it really is. Whatever setups, whatever
music, whomever is playing in this, these bands at the time. WHAT??! Now
there is again a new line-up, new sounds, new band...
Has
this project existed before this show? Will it exist after the show?
Alex Kazam vs. Danny Trombone is very much in the same speed as any previous
bands I've been a part of so this isn't new at all. Alex K.D.T. takes
out the usual band type setup and replaces it with laptops/turntables
and free jazz/soul/groove movements. This isn't a one-trick, one-shot
pony, this is the best way to get all sorts of sound into someone's head,
simple.
It
seems a lot of people are moving to Montreal. Please comment.
I don't want to generalize for everyone that has moved to Montreal, but
it's hard to find a city with more inspiration, more culture, more vibe
anywhere else in Canada. Go there, love it, see what makes the city so
beautiful...
What
do you hope to achieve with the sounds you make?
I want everyone to fall in love during our sets. Every song is for me
a love song. Yeah, we might toss in some Ed Rush & Optical. But it's still
about the love groove. At the same time I want to make more people see
how indisposable certain musics are by giving them all a few mintues of
rotation and TLC.
What
would you like to point out to people witnessing your show? (Perhaps something
they may not have noticed if you hadn't pointed it out that will actually
increase their enjoyment of the music you make.)
I was once an African delivery boy in a past life.
What
would your ideal audience look like?
Hmmm... interesting... I wouldn't want to be able to see many of them...
they should be constantly moving around and up and down...
Describe
one of your songs.
One song?? Ill-atmospherics start up, then bring in some French conversations...
on the laptop bring up a bit of bass drops, keep them all going in/out
of sync, drop an easy break... see what I like, then it's just a process
of choosing the right beats to mix and match with more beats, bass, ambience,
and trick sampling live, all the while wanting to jump out and kiss the
person nearest the stage..
Anything
else?
I love you...
- interview
by Paddy O'Donnell
CHRISTIANA
WAVELENGTH #86 Sunday October 21, 11:30pm
Purveyors of: Loudly make love, not war
web: www.highschoolchampion.com
Pictured: Paul Boddum, Dave Rodgers, Jonny Dovercourt, Andrew McAllister
(photo by Sara C. Montgomery)
Dave:
The bill collectors, they call my home, scam my wife when I'm not home?
As a kid I would sometimes field the bill collector calls. Half-truths
were my specialty. My Mom and Dad would get mad at the bill collectors,
I pissed them off by being so calm.
I once worked with someone who had major student debts. The bill collector called up a friend of my colleague and pretended to be a long-lost friend of the debtor. Unfortunately they neglected to look at the file to note the gender of the ower. This person's name was Robin. The friend caught on and told outrageous lies to the agency, ensuring they would not receive payment for at least a decade.
Andrew:
I like Nike but wait a minute, the neighbourhood supports so put some
money in it, the corporations owe, they gotta give up the dough to my
town or else we gotta shut 'em down?
Today, I conceive of the relegation of the Nike logo to the public domain,
and the dissolution of the corporation's assets and structure. Funds would
be channeled into the American social welfare system including education
systems, housing and bringing American hospitals into the public domain,
from being privately owned. Designers, advertising executives and sales
people would be put to work on national and international aid projects
which would serve constituents to the betterment of the world. By putting
the "swoosh" into the public domain, there would be no trademark
to enforce, no protected identity and nothing to sell.
However, this manoeuvre might cause far worse problems. For instance, It might simply perpetuate a globalized North American mindset to the rest of the world through a missionary-like rhetoric. It might simply force large corporations to be more innovative, and find more insidious ways to keep people consuming material goods - to such an extent that global "branding" would seem like a birthday present.
Where does that leave us? Christiana has never been a political band exclusively, nor have we all seen eye to eye on every issue. Myself, I do not feel comfortable prescribing how people ought to respond to an event or taking a hard line. I have described certain feelings or areas of conflict in songs like "Divided Loyalties" or "Projector Lamp", but fallen short of providing real direction. That's why I think our contribution to music and community is the sense that something else is possible. That the world is not a binary opposition, that we are offering option "C" in lieu of option "A" or "B". By demonstrating a passion for action, for the depth and possibility of creativity, personal vigilance and the promise of hope and possibility, perhaps I can blow the cobwebs out of someone's mind for 30 minutes. Perhaps I can too show them that they are capable of making change in the world, of their own design and vision.
Jonny:
Raw, I'ma give it to ya, with no trivia, raw like cocaine straight from
Bolivia?
That's right, rugged and raw. Being in Christiana lets me bring in the
rock. I just get up there and rock the bass. It's not "my" band,
but from the moment I joined, it felt so easy and natural 'cause I go
so far back with these boys. Dave and I played in a band in high school,
and we've known Andrew since then, and even though we didn't meet Paul
till later, he's a Scarborough boy too, so we all understand each other
and communicate easily, both when we're playing and just hanging out.
There's something sweet and melancholy about the suburbs, at least when you think about growing up there, rather than being stuck there. Though it's completely different economically, I get the same sense from the Wu-Tang Clan's old-school video for "Can It All Be So Simple". Yeah, I know, you're quoting " Da Mystery of Chessboxing". 36 Chambers is one of those essential discs Fuck it, I don't know what else to say, other than " Free the ODB!"
Paul:
I go do it, I go do it, I go do it do it do it, and I'm here, and I'm
there, I'm Big Bad Hank and I'm everywhere?
We have a new album on High School Champion Records (www.highschoolchampion.com)
coming out in January 2002. We're out of the studio for this one and the
money saved has been funneled into illegal substances, some recording
software, and beyond that I'm just the drummer.
- interview
by Buddy 1078
THE
CREEPING NOBODIES
WAVELENGTH #86 Sunday October 21, 10:45pm
Purveyors of: We'll get back to you
Pictured: The shadow of the season
email: thecreepingnobodies@hotmail.com
This band has been
known to contain...
1-Marco Landini
1-Eric Abboud
1-Matthew McDonough
2-Westerholms (Derek, George)
1- Julia Muth
Lineage may be traced
back to, continued from or included with the following establishments...
Parts Unknown
Sinphonic
Currently In These United States
Speedway
Celestino
The Creeping Nobodies
-by-
The Creeping Nobodies
Yes, we are the ones
Who came to your party
-Uninvited-
Drank your booze
And left the King Tubby albums scattered
At your turntable
We don't think about King Tubby often
We don't sound like
King Tubby
We came and left unnoticed
By the light of a man-made filament.
FOLK
FESTIVAL MASSACRE
WAVELENGTH #87 Sunday October 28, 11:00pm
Purveyors of: "I hate hippies"
web: www.highschoolchampion.com
Pictured: Alastair MacLeod (guitar, vocals), Leanne Davies (drums), Greg
Chambers (bass)
Alastair MacLeod has assembled a new trio line-up for Folk Festival Massacre's pre-Halloween Wavelength show. Doc Pickles interviewed him.
What
is the coolest thing you ever learned from Sesame Street?
That I could still enjoy watching the show long after my childhood.
Which
Muppet would be best suited to replace Peter Gabriel in Genesis instead
of that drip Phil Collins?
Kermit - they were both consumate showmen.
Do
you remember those little guys in Fraggle Rock who built those plastic
structures, and then all the Fraggles would eat them, so they'd build
more, then the Fraggles would eat them again? Man, that was madness. Why
didn't the little ones just quit building and take it easy? What made
them keep building their little plastic structures amidst all that madness?
I never really watched Fraggle Rock but the guy who did the music, Phil
Balsam, was my sister's landlord for years. Even though I didn't watch
FR, I would expect the little guys are like bees making honey.
Which
muppet should run for public office?
Oscar the Grouch, he was the most practical muppet or maybe Bert, he had
vision.
Which
version of Sesame Street was better - the American one with all the Spanish
or the Canadian version?
I only watched the Canadian one so I can't tell you. I wonder how not
having that Canadian content affected the American kids.
Didn't
Animal look like he was having the BEST time all the time? Was it the
rhythm in his bones that made him want to play drums or the drums that
put the rhythm in his bones? How is Leanne similar to Animal?
Animal was on drugs wasn't he? Animal smiles a lot while he plays and
so does Leanne.
Which
of the following awesome songs do you think is the better song and why:
a) "The Rainbow Connection" b) "It's Not Easy Being Green"
c) "C is for Cookie"
I can't tell you which one is best, it depends on your mood, but I have
always loved "It's Not Easy Being Green". It really says something
about working with what you've got but if you are in the mood for a cookie
it wouldn't cut it.
What
the hell WAS Gonzo anyway?
I think the other muppets wondered too. Wasn't he a bird of some kind?
Maybe he was created in Bunsen Honeydew's lab.
Which
Muppet would be the perfect mascot for Folk Festival Massacre?
Elmo after he had been smeared all over the highway by a semi.
THE
WAXMANNEQUIN
WAVELENGTH #87 Sunday October 28, 10:00pm
web: www.waxmannequin.com
Which
worldwide conspiracy does the Wax Mannequin belong to:
a) the JFK assassination conspiracy?
b) the conspiracy where aliens have replaced Michael Jackson with one
of their own?
c) the conspiracy of apathy?
d) the fixed series of the Chicago Black Sox?
e) Other (please elaborate)?
e) Wax Mannequin
is a representative from the High Council of Jimmy. As such, though sympathetic
to the causes of all conspiracies everywhere, Wax Mannequin is spiritually
bound to promoting and expanding the Jimmy Empire first and foremost.
What
superpowers do you possess?
Wax Mannequin possesses no superpowers, he merely has the ability to endow
others with Super Powers and JimmyPoints.
How
did you clear this Wavelength appearance with your superiors?
The High Council was informed of this performance by means of a secret
dance that Wax Mannequin engaged in (while naked) at night.
What
superpower do you not possess, but you wish you did?
Wax Mannequin does not possess the Super Power entitled "Morning
is the Best Time". This Power allows the subject to turn into a Robot
for one hour each and every morning. Wax Mannequin is a Telephone Salesman
by day and often finds it difficult to motivate himself in the early hours.
This ability would surely help him reach sales targets.
Using
a massive amount of hyperbole, describe to the Wavelength Crew what to
expect from Wax Mannequin?
Wax Mannequin will rinse you clean of all blood and other bodily fluids
using a Secret Foaming Body Wash. These dangerous natural fluids will
be replaced by a special force know as STYNON T energy. STYNON T is an
exciting blue substance that enables individuals to reach deep into the
VERY HEART OF BEING. Here there will be One Million Dollars for the taking.
One Million Dollars and Several Free Automobiles!
What
superpower do you not possess, and you're glad you don't?
I am glad that I am not one of those people who have the superpower of
"Not Having Any Arms or Legs". I see these people on the street
sometimes and it never looks like they are having very much fun.
Using
understatement, describe to the Wavelength Crew what to expect from Wax
Mannequin?
Wax Mannequin will be like winning a free dish of cereal.
What
superpower do you possess, and you wish you didn't?
As stated earlier, Wax Mannequin possesses no Super Powers per se, however
he does have a considerably enhanced sense of taste. This is rather inconvenient
as the flavour of every food impurity is magnified unimaginably. For this
reason Wax Mannequin can only tolerate eating brown beans and organically
grown rice.
Which
class of music does the Wax Mannequin seek to subvert:
a) dance music?
b) Men Without Hats?
c) Art rock?
d) FACTOR grant/SOCAN rock?
e) Other (please extrapolate)?
Wax Mannequin strives to subvert all forms of music other those created
by Wax Mannequin (with the exception of Men Without Hats; "Safety
Dance" is a work of Art). The music of Wax Mannequin captures the
absurdity of all human experience. There is no need for other sorts of
music (except for "Safety Dance", because "Safety Dance"
reminds us of the many Dangers involved with more reckless forms of dancing).
- interview by Doc Pickles