Ether
Faceless Forces of Bigness
The Meligrove Band
Superband Wasteband
Fake Brain
Boneclock
Mason Hornet
It's Patrick

ETHER
WAVELENGTH #39 SUNDAY NOVEMBER 5, 11PM

Ether consist of Sharin, Ryder, Rob and Kerri. Lucifer appears to them in parachute pants. They answer questions.
- Paddy O'Donnell

You used to be Absolute Ether. Now you're Ether. Does this mean you are making a statement, living in a world of no absolutes, or is the explanation for this more banal?
Yes. New members, new name.

Do you think it wise to name your group after an anaesthetic? Does it reflect in the music you play?
I've heard it from someone who knows that Ether makes you feel like crap, so hopefully not. It's more like "it's out in the ether, man" than "I'm going to give you a shot of ether, ma'am".

Your group is split between the sexes. Is there any need to comment about this? Absolutely.

Other members, other projects?
We don't talk about our infidelities, but yes, there are a few.

It seems there is a conscious effort to draw from a sonic palette of sorts; is it the intention to create a certain mood in the music?
Once the wigs are on, we go straight for the groove. We are a fairly new band (at least in this particular incarnation - Sharin and Rob have been playing together for years now - before Absolute Ether there was a little band that could be named Sally Cinnamon), so we don't always gel the way we'd like to, but the more we play, the more our sound comes together. It seems that we have an '80s devil vying for attention, and he's hard to ignore, so there's that, in combination with Sharin's vocal stylin' and all the rest. The first time we all jammed together there was an awesome groovy tension to our sound, which is, in part anyway, what we're going for.

What informs your art? What inspires your muse?
Well, for Sharin, it's about the fruit she eats. Sometimes she has a banana day, other times a tomato. Which is a fruit, you know.

Is music ever "just music"?
Let's consult the French in this regard. Bon la la, selon le Micro Robert de Kerri, seulement quand c'est la musiquette, definition: "musique legere sans valeur artistique". Merci Wavelength! Dimanche!

FACELESS FORCES OF BIGNESS
WAVELENGTH #39 SUNDAY NOVEMBER 5, 10PM

Faceless Forces of Bigness. Who are they? What do they want ? (faces?)
Chris Stringer - Analog filtering/instrumentless console
Tom Heron - Instrumentless console
Michael Phillip Wojewoda - Vintage synths/ filtering/vocoding
Justin Stephenson - Laptop video/text generation
Michael: FFB is a spontaneous collective of four visual and aural polluters.
Actually, three aural and one visual you do the math. The title of the ensemble, Faceless Forces of Bigness, was created in a panic. As I approached Jonathan Bunce one evening to secure the gig, he asked me what we were called. The only thing I could think of that sounded like a band name was the title of a cosmology/physics article from Scientific American magazine, circa 1980. So I blurted it out. He said he liked it, so there it is.
Justin: Yes faces we are hungry for faces! If you take the dictionary definition of the face as being the front part of the head from the forehead to the chin, the horror film version of our story would go something like this: We are four anatomically challenged humans in a furious search for faces this inevitably involves acquiring them from somewhere. This is where things could get messy.
Chris: You already know who we are so the real question is "What do they want?" Speaking as one half of the instrumentless console tandem of FFB, I can say that tops on our list is the inclusion of David Lee Roth in the future works of Van Halen. Can this be achieved through instrumentless console music? Why, yes I think it can.

How/why was FFB born? What is it giving you a chance to do that your other projects don't?
Michael: For me, I'm exploring an older school of electronic music. Generating landscapes without falling back on familiar techniques (i.e., sampling/MIDI/etc.), and keeping the compositional tools simpler, keeps me more interested in the process. In a way, I'm celebrating the fact that electronic music is an 80 year old art form. Seeing as the year 2000 is the last year of the 20th century, I want to pay homage to one of the greatest 20th century art forms.
Justin: I was approached by MPW with the idea of forming a music/visual collective a few months ago. This is something I've been interested in for some time and I jumped at the chance. Film is often full enough of constraints and concerns that, while I enjoy them, it's nice to step back from them to approch the medium from a different angle. FFB is a chance for me to explore film-making from a performance standpoint... spontanious improvised editing in the present tense with the creation of the music... an opportunity to collaborate in real time with musicians... to treat film as a musical medium.

I have heard that you are using unconventional sound/speaker systems in your shows. Could you describe the set-up and the motivation behind it?
Michael: Actually we may not have the surround sound this performance. Sadly, our fifth member, Quad Boy, has moved on. So, it's back to stereo for us lads.
Chris: It seems the rigorous lack of rehearsals and our exhaustive schedule of no shows was too much for him. (Actually, Quad Boy had a previous touring engagement that conflicted with him participating in the Nov 5th date.) What can people expect to experience at the upcoming show?
Michael: Frenetic atonal arhythmics, haunting instrumentless console feedback systems, video and still visual loops and dives, electronically generated text poetics.
Justin: While it won't be anarchy, I think that it'll be a wild performance all of us feeding off of each other's movements without tightly composed "songs" things could turn on a dime.
Chris: As far as instrumentless console music goes, this show really allows Tom Heron and myself to publicly present a brand of music that we've been creating behind closed studio doors for the past two to three years. The added excitement of performing it to an audience and the gear restrictions that are now a part of making the operation mobile, only provide new opportunities for discovering strange, new feedback combinations that are the very center of what we do. Wrap all this up in the blanket of fun that is creating with other performers, and it should prove to be an exciting evening, indeed.

What do the Faceless Forces have planned for the future?
Michael: Good question. To develop as an ensemble. Keep it alive. Dig up some funding. Bring quad back into the picture.
Justin: The building of this collective is an exciting proposition...like the music, I think we'll have to wait and see what happens. (Anarchy and world domination to go back to the horror film version of our story.)
Chris: Again speaking from the perspective of instrumentless console music, venueless gigs comes to mind. It's all about a minimalist "lessening" of things. ("I'll have one cheeseburger to go hold the bun! And a milkshake - no cup".) But definitely more performances in the future.

- Interview by Tungo Boneclock

THE MELIGROVE BAND
WAVELENGTH #40 SUNDAY NOVEMBER 12, 11pm

"Remember that time we told you we were playing at the Horseshoe, but didn't know what time, and ended up with the early spot, which resulted in you getting there just after we finished? I was just thinking about that an hour or so ago, and now I'm checking our email, and... hey! It's Joanne!"
- Mike Small, The Meligrove Band

I love The Meligrove Band. They're nice guys and they play catchy, poppy, rockin' songs that remind me of what I loved about the mid-'90s - The Super Friendz, Redd Kross, The Lemonheads and Sloan. My love for them knows no bounds, so it is with deep regret I inform you that lead guitar player Jason Nunes either didn't like my questions or didn't have time to reply (as if!).

So this is the work of Mike Small (bass), Ricky Gomes (drums) and Darcy Rego (guitar/singing).

Age and fave snack food?
Mike: 21 (and a half!). Reese's Pieces. The other guys will tell you theirs, but in case they don't, they're all 21 too... but I'm still the oldest (marginally) and toughest (statistically)!
Darcy: Nibs mixed with melted Glossette raisins.

When are you going to move away from Mississauga? Where are you going to go?
Darcy: Well, I'd like to leave Mississauga A.S.A.P. and move to my grandma's house in... uh... Mississauga!

Put together your dream band. Members can be fictional, deceased or still rockin' in the free world.
Ricky: Me on drums, Jimi Hendrix on guitar, John Paul Jones on bass, Al Green on vocals and Ben Folds on piano.
Darcy: Pete Townshend, Satan and my Mom!!

Who's on your wavelength?
Mike: Ash. (could this be the hero of the Evil Dead films? give-me-back-my-hand ed.)
Darcy: My dog Milo and that guy who rips your ticket stubs at the movies. Don't ask!

Rock'n'roll in Toronto. What does it mean to you?
Mike: Missing the last band of the night and still being really, really tired in my morning lectures.
Ricky: Rock is hard, roll means you can move fast. Right?
Darcy: I believe it means a genre of music played in the capital city of Ontario - do these get any harder c'mon!!!

Licorice allsorts vs. those hard fruity candies with the soft goop in the middle?
Mike: Licorice rules... Especially black licorice. I know a lot of people disagree with that, but they're just conforming to society. Don't you know that black is the colour of anarchy?
Darcy: SOFT GOOP, SOFT GOOP!!!

Do you really want to hurt me?
Mike: If you "write" for Chart magazine, then, yes.
Ricky: More then you will ever know.... (YIKES!!!!)

Where did our love go?
Mike: In the pines. Whatever those are.
Darcy: I thought you had it last?

How soon is now?
Mike: Is the pious a part of the just, or is the just a part of the pious? Hint: The pious is a part of the just.

Should I stay or should I go?
Mike: The Clash facking rule. But I move that that song be stricken from the record.
Ricky: Stay right next to me baby...
Darcy: Why? Did you find something else to do huh?

Have you ever really loved a woman?
Ricky: Usually on the weekends.
Darcy: Not like my dog!?!

The meaning of life, Meligrove-style?
Mike: When your kick pedal falls apart, just steal Sloan's!
Ricky: Have fun while U can!
Darcy: Eat a lot of peanuts, unless you're allergic, then forget we said that!

- Interview by Zombiegirl

SUPERBAND WASTEBAND
WAVELENGTH #40 SUNDAY NOVEMBER 12, 10PM

Sanitorium Hot Dog interviewed Superband Wasteband. The answers may not be enlightening, but at least they are entertaining.

Who are you, where do you come from, what do you want to with your lives???!!! (And which instruments do you play, if you don't mind me asking?)
We are Kimi (bass, vocals), Myles (drums) and Kim (guitar, vocals). We seem to be here now, but don't know where we came from or how we got here. As a band, I'm pretty sure we want to be rock stars. As individuals, the possibilities are endless.

The "waste" in your name makes one speculate that "trash" may play an important role in your aesthetic. Is this total bullshit or not?
We try to keep our world revolving around trash. We were going to play a gig in Kirkland Lake, but I think it's been moved to Michigan.

How are you dealing with the Worldwide Tequila Shortage?
We only drink perrier and white wine spritzers, so this so-called "shortage" really doesn't affect us.

How do you deal with people who get Kim and Kimi mixed up?
We wear badges.

Boxers or briefs?
We've never really discussed our preference in panties, but we can all agree that as long as they're made with a superband waistband, who cares.

FAKE BRAIN
WAVELENGTH #41 SUNDAY NOVEMBER 19, 11PM

Fake Brain come to us from New York City. Their music is literate and shape-shifting rock. Wavelength's Tungo Boneclock, a former collaborator with Fake Brain's Gideon Kendall, was the natural choice to formulate the questions. Interview begins now.

You came out of Cooper Union leading a band called Very Pleasant Neighbour, but left them in 1994 to form a new band that ultimately became Fake Brain. What vision did you have for the band at the time, and how has it evolved?
I had no real musical training, but I grew up amidst lots of dance and theatre stuff (Dad wuz a director, Mom a ballerina). I didn't care much about music when I was little, except I knew I liked songs that told stories, like Bob Dylan. It wasn't until I was in high school and went to my first punk-rock concert that I thought about playing music myself. I approached playing in a band more as a performance and a way of communicating my verbal ideas than as "playing music". I relied on my other band members to deal with constructing the sound. Over the years, a certain degree of musical understanding has seeped in, I guess, and when I quit my first band, I was faced with the challenge of creating more of the entire song on my own. Fortunately I was able to find musicians (in Marc, Andrew, and before that, Kevin and Wendy) who could listen to my very primitive demos and flesh them out; solidify the melodies, add hooks, etc. I was forced to play bass for a couple years (until we found James; see later question), and although I hated it, it certainly helped me to learn about mysterious things like notes and nice orders to put them in. When I quit Very Pleasant Neighbor, I wanted my new band to get back to a more fun, raw punk kind of sound and performance attitude. This has evolved into a sound that incorporates psychedelic guitar textures and good-old-new-wave bleeps and bloops; along with an increasing interest in throbbing grooves.

Pretty consistently over the years, your lyrics have had a certain skewed self-awareness that makes light of being human, being messy bio-organic ambulatory creatures. What role do lyrics play in your songs, and has there been a common thread throughout the years?
Lyrics are the thing that I am most concerned with. It all goes back to reading Dr. Seuss books when I was little, and hearing Dylan's "Jack of Hearts"- almost all of our songs start with the lyrics. There are basically two different goals that I am pursuing in my lyric writing. One is to attempt to skewer the real reasons behind the stupid things that people do to themselves, each other, and the world. The other kind of song is one that ignores reality, and creates another world. These songs are harder to come by. I guess there is a third type, which is even rarer, which is a song that starts out as a type 2 song but ends up speaking to the same issues as a type 1 song, but by approaching it from an odd angle makes the song even more resonant. Dylan used to do this all the time. Robyn Hitchcock does it when he's at his best. A good example of this in poetry would be the surreal fairytale poems of Kenneth Patchen.

A year or so ago, James (bass) joined the band. You put down the bass and guitar to focus more on vocals, and playing your "device", and Fake Brain seemed to be reborn. What does James bring to the band, and what did/does that open up for you and the band?
I suck as a bass player. So in that sense, getting any bass player would have been great. Along with his bass chops, James brings many other elements to the band. He's got a bizarre and crude sense of humor, and great stage outfits. He's also very short, which makes me look taller, which I like. Our live show is vastly improved since James joined the Brain. The rhythm section is tighter and capable of doing much more than before. Having a bass player has allowed me to perform better as a lead singer and frontman, increased my ability to improvise onstage, etc. I have also built a device, which I call "the device". I use it live to help bring some of the weirder sounds from our records into the live show. It consists of a drum trigger pad, a cheap-o sampler, a cowbell, an old "bullet" mic, and a dinky keyboard, all running through an overdriven solid state amp and mounted on a cymbal stand.

Fake Brain, the band that comes with a comic book. How many issues are out? Where are you in the storyline(s)?
I always like it when a band has a persona or story that goes beyond just being a bunch of organisms on stage playing songs Devo was great at that kinda stuff. We had talked for a long time about creating an "origin" of the band. The comic was started by me and James last year while we were touring, kind of as a lark, and has since become a major part of the Fake Brain concept. Issue 4 has just been released. So far every issue has seen an increase in # of pages, plot complexity, unexplained incongruities, and guest artists. The plot is too complicated to explain here and now, suffice to say it involves a three-nostrilled mad scientist, an evil rehearsal space owner, a rap-metal band called The Fonkay Ca$hgrabbaz, giant shins, and lots of mayo.

You have a history of tall skinny guitar players with big noses why?
Must be some deeply repressed homosexual desire on my part.

Not that we don't appreciate it, but why are you travelling all this way to do a single show in Toronto?
Well, fortunately, it looks like we have at least one other show that weekend, maybe two. We've got a booking agent now who's helping us out. But even if we didn't, we'd come to T.O. anyway. I love Toronto. It kicks NYC's ass, albeit in a polite Canadian kind of way.

What irons are in the Fake Brain fire?
We're finishing up an EP of new material right now, almost at the mixing stage. We are also almost finished with an EP of cover versions; songs that we've occasionally played live over the past few years by Devo, Pink Floyd, Christina Aguilera, etc. After finishing these records, we will work on new material over the winter. We hope to tour extensively in the spring and summer of next year.

BONECLOCK
WAVELENGTH #41 SUNDAY NOVEMBER 19, 10PM

Boneclock is a brand-new ensemble making their live debut at Wavelength on Nov. 19. It is the brainchild of singer/songwriter/multi-instrumentalist and Wavelength pro-activist Kevin Lacroix. His brain is picked by Paddy O'Donnell

You came to T.O. by way of NYC. What are the fundamental differences between making music there and making music here?
Unfortunately, I can't really compare the two because I haven't really gotten to know Toronto yet. I got here two years ago, and have spent most of that time cooped up trying to write and demo songs by myself almost completely out of touch with the community. It was really only this summer that I realized how much I missed playing in a band and making music with other people. NYC was totally different... by the time I joined Gideon to form Mess (which later became Fake Brain), he had been with Very Pleasant Neighbour for years, so we kinda hit the ground running, in terms of knowing our way around, getting on shows with great bands, etc. So Toronto has been very different in that I am only now starting to get involved and experience making music here.

This project came together at the last minute, but you have known most of the players for some time. Elaborate.
Mark Adam (drums) and I met at the Banff Centre in 1996. We became great friends, and have worked together a couple of times since; we had a band called TUNGOspa, and we also did some music for modern dance together. We come from completely different backgrounds musically, but we know each other's playing pretty well. Geordie Haley (guitar/synthesizer, plays with Out of Order) and I have been friends for a couple of years through a mutual friend. We share a rehearsal room but have never played together. And I just got a call from Marc Rogers sounds like he's gonna play bass for us. Haven't met him yet.. but he sounds like a nice guy.

The band Fake Brain are playing Wavelength at your recommendation. They are from the aforementioned NYC. What are they about and why do you like them?
They write really tight songs, big hooks, and they play them hard at the same time they are musical and fun, without being silly. I look forward to seeing the Ted's crowd reaction to them... I think they'll blow a lot of people away. And they are very friendly.

Why is it important to you to express yourself through musical means? What is the nature of that expression to you?
At the best of times, what music provides for me is an opening to ride whatever is happening and not think or make decisions. Just get inside the song, be moved, and be the cause of what is going on at the same time. Other times what makes making music irresistible comes from the experience I have of it as a listener; being so blown away by something that I just get a case of "Hey! I want to be able to do that!" and then go off and try to do it.

You play guitar, drums, various percussive instruments and the dumbek (amongst other things). Do you find yourself drawn to all these things in equal stead, or is one holding a certain power over you?
Sometimes I wish one did hold a power over me, and kicked my ass until I mastered it. From a pure playing perspective, I have the most fun playing drum kit (I am a pretty advanced novice) or dumbek. They make sense to me, physically, musically. On the other hand, creatively, making whole songs inventing and combining all of the parts to make a whole thing is totally compelling. I think it's that process that drives me most of time.

What does the future hold?
More shows. Maybe a Boneclock/Fake Brain tour next spring or summer. I think I am going into the Fake Studio in Brooklyn this winter to make a record with Gid. On other fronts: the yet-to-be-named-collective is slowly rolling along. There is a small core of us working at founding an not-for-profit collective of musicians as a platform for eventually aquiring a space for independent musicians from the downtown area to collaborate, perform, rehearse, hopefully even record. Baby steps right now, but that is where our sights are set. I eagerly invite any and all who would like to either get involved or find out more to get in touch with me.

- contact Kevin at klacroix@montanab.com

MASON HORNET
WAVELENGTH #42 SUNDAY NOVEMBER 26, 11pm

interview between Natalie Dot-Dash and Doc Pickles, lead singer of satirical noise-pop sextet (heh heh) Mason Hornet, is as followsƒ.

Your song "Hot Pants" is about your infamous red underwear. If you could be anybody's underwear, who's would you be and what would you look like?
The really classic underwear would be Redd Foxx's full length red wool suit. Nobody looked classier than old Redd. He was trying to stay hip with the times and wanted to change his name to Reddd Foxxx, but the networks wouldn't go for it. But I don't really want to get too close to Redd Foxx. Maybe Albert Einstein's underwear. He's one of my heroes and he seems to have good personal hygene very important to underwear.

Mason Hornet's long awaited album - what are you going to call it and when is it coming out?
Awww jeez. I wish I knew. Making albums is like growing potatoes, and unfortunately I've had a few bouts with potato blight lately. The beds for the songs are all ready to go, but I need to win a lottery or something to finish it. It's hard to be a self-financed pop band with the income of a temp. All that frustration has helped me in some ways, though. If I had released the album a couple years ago when I was more immature, I would have let all the attention get to my head, and then when I realized people didn't really care whether I was recording an epic or a piece of shit, it would disappoint me and I would have continued along my life at the investment bank, eventually selling out and becoming very unhappy. Rich, but unhappy. I'd rather be frustrated than unhappy. All this frustration has led to close to 100 little "Doc Pickles"-sized songs being recorded on four-track for my Audiozine project. Remember, the first ingredient to a good curry is patience.

You have the opportunity to take over David Hasselhoff's body for a day at any time in his life. When would this be and what would he be doing?
I would wander up to the Golden Mile in East York, where all the used car shops are. I'd be dressed up in Speedo's and start picking fights with SUVs. If anybody tried to stop me, I'd say "Hey, hands off. You can't touch this. I'm David F*@KING Hasselhoff and I'm big in Germany! Stay in school and don't do drugs."

You have won the "win a date with Felicity" contest - where do you take her?
I'm not very good at dates most of the time we just go for long moonlit walks, conversations, yadda yadda yadda. Knowing Felicity, she might go for that. But not for long. She has a wild side, you know. She'd like me better if I were David Hasselhoff. I'm afraid she might feel a little threatened at the sight of chest hair. I have a bit of a complex about Felicity. I feel like I should get to know her better before we start the mating dance.

If Mason Hornet could perform on any TV show either now or in the past, what show would that be and what would you be wearing?
A costume is the best way to break down that fourth wall between the artist and the audience. Television is a strange medium for me because there's really no way to connect with real live people. I can imagine Mason Hornet being in their element in the days before the industrial revolution I'd love to be in one of those travelling minstrel troupes that would wander from town to town putting on hammy performances for a few pennies. Then after the show's done you can get drunk with all the people who took the trouble to watch your show. It wouldn't be that way on television, it's too artificial. On one hand, there's no one-on-one connection between the cathode ray tube and the eyeball, so that excludes the artist from their own performance and from the audience. On the other hand, watching television forces the viewer to exclude others who are sharing in the room. TV isolates people, and that makes them impressionable and, more often than not, it makes them want to buy things. Maybe it would be cool to be on one of those old variety radio shows, like the old Jack Benny show where they move so effortlessly between skits and songs. There's a warmer feel on radio than on television. If I did have to be on TV though, I'd like to be dressed in a costume where it looks like I'm the one watching the television. Maybe I'd wear nothing but an empty TV box and suspenders.

IT'S PATRICK
WAVELENGTH #42: SUNDAY NOVEMBER 26, 10pm

Questions about water... Steve Keeping was on a raft with Doc Pickles down by their rehearsal space to answer these questions. Michelle kept throwing beer bottles with her answers, but sometimes she kind of missed. Rudy's delay pedal hypnotized him so unfortunately he never made it out.

What's new aboard the S.S. It's Patrick?
Steve: Designer lifejackets this one is a Calvin Klein.

Which is your favourite state: steam, water, or ice?
Steve: Ice of course, it's better for rap names. I've never heard any rappers putting steam or water in their names but maybe they should. Like Black Steam or something Steam Clean, Clean Steam.

When you're writing a song, do you plant the crops first before irrigating, or do you need to water the soil before planting?
Steve: In spring we plant...in autumn we harvest.

Have you ever played a show in Waterloo?
Steve: Individually.

How does Waterloo differ from, say, a city that actually is next to water?
Steve: The fish isn't as fresh
Michelle: The seamonsters get really pissed off.

Is synchronized swimming a sport or is it art?
Steve: For entertainment purposes only. I like the little hats. It's all one big Busby Berkeley extravaganza check this out: The Kid From Spain (1932) Dances directed by Busby Berkeley; Eddie Cantor is mistaken for a matador, and the Goldwyn Girls form a human tortilla. Has Cantor in blackface, Paulette Goddard, Lucille Ball, and Betty Grable in the chorus. Now that's entertainment! A human tortilla! Think about it, man!

Why does mainstream music seem so watered-down?
Steve: Instant music. Just add water and stir. Great formula but no one seems to get the proportions right.

What's the best watering hole in Toronto?
Steve: My mouth works best

Walkerton: Are there storm clouds on the horizon or is it all just water under the bridge?
Steve: Uhh...we're not answering any political questions at this time. It will all be addressed in the debates, thank you very much.

Hermann Broch once said: "Those who live by the sea can hardly form a single thought of which the sea would not be part." What is It's Patrick's "sea"?
Steve: Hermann who?
Michelle: Music.

If somebody is described as having a dry sense of humour, what is the opposite?
Steve: Pass.
Michelle: Rivers of tears.

Is Oceania our friend and Eurasia our enemy, or is Eurasia our friend and Oceania our enemy? I haven't been able to keep track since 1984.
Steve: What's that? The Eurythmics oh yes, yes I remember them. Seemed friendly enough. Is Eurasia a supergroup between the members of Europe and the members of Asia? Wait a minute, weren't they both supergroups already? My god, they must be unstoppable!!! Run for your lives!!!!

Do dolphins really enjoy living in aquariums?
Steve: The one I had as a kid didn't seem very happy but I think I needed a bigger tank. Nobody ever warned me how big those damn things get!!

How does the orca feel when he's forced to kiss a seal on the lips for food?
Steve: Better than most big stars... I mean who would you rather kiss? A seal or Clive Davis?
Michelle: Definitely a seal, but I don't think I'd want to kiss Seal.

Does everyone really love a holiday watching the whales as they swim and play, or is it okay if some of us find the experience to be a little depressing?
Steve: You have to keep in mind that they aren't really playing. It's all hard work. They are all just warming up for their Marineland auditions.

What on earth is happening to Joan Rivers' face?
Steve: See answer to Orca question above.