Sinphonic
Winterbrief
Fembots
Folk Festival Massacre
Wayne Omaha
The Mountainside Band
ARC
Michelle McAdorey

SINPHONIC
web: http://www.accessv.com/~giggs/sinhome2.htm
WAVELENGTH #13 SUNDAY MAY 7, 11PM

Wavelength managed to contact Sinphonic after a series of hostile takeovers and nasty mergers. An interview between the entity known as Sinphonic and an anonymous Wavelength correspondent follows.

It has been a while since you have played live. Could you tell us what you've been up to?
Through the combination of our aggressive network construction, back office development programs and key acquisitions, Sinphonic has built one of the most advanced, comprehensive and strategic music-based assets in the world. With sales, installations and network deployment all accelerating and the integration of the new CD The Fourth Way completed, we are executing across the music business to rapidly capitalize on the significant Sinphonic opportunity.

What can people expect from your live show?
There is a set of statistics Sinphonic reports that provides a useful indication of operating performance. These statistics are fan growth, average revenue per fan unit (ARPFU), churn rate and marketing cost of acquisition (COA) per gross fan addition. Sinphonic is pleased with its performance of each of these key metrics. Could you say a bit more about the marketing cost of acquisition statistic? Marketing COA expenses, consisting of postering, strings, patch cords, drum skin subsidies, etc. are incurred and expensed upfront. Postering-related expenditures tend to be fixed at a certain dollar level based on an estimate of what is necessary to generate a targeted amount of activations in a given live appearance. To the extent the actual take of the door activations are higher or lower than targeted, then the overall marketing COA statistic will be better or worse, respectively.

Great. What else is going on?
At the end for fiscal 1999 Sinphonic has $855 million of unrestricted cash and short-term deposits on its balance sheet to fund its exciting and rapid growth. Sinphonic has the scale, momentum and resources necessary to carry out our strategy for 2000. Shareholder earnings increased from $4.26 to $8.47 (diluted) per share, but there's a lot more to the story. At the same time we've improved our margins and lowered our costs. Reducing the cost of our rehearsals and reigning in our exorbitant consumption of alcoholic beverages has made us more competitive and positioned us to be an industry leader.

What are your plans for the future?
Sinphonic will continue to launch new markets and expand the coverage area of its networks as justified by attractive potential returns on investment.

Any final words?
1999 was a tremendous year of achievement for Sinphonic both on the building and operating fronts. The aforementioned answers to your insightful and penetrating questions clearly demonstrates Sinphonic is uniquely positioned for success. On behalf of the entire Sinphonic team, we will continue to deliver on the promise.

WINTERBRIEF
web:http://home.earthlink.net/~hubcityrec/winterbrief.html WAVELENGTH #18 SUNDAY JUNE 11

Winterbrief are playing Toronto May 7th at Ted's Wrecking Yard for the WAVELENGTH series. They are also playing some other Canadian dates.(check website link below for more info) Here they answer some silly questions... by: natalie dot-dash

1)You have just had a break in and your entire music collection has gone missing. Which 3 are the most painful?
JULIAN: There would be so much more than 3 but I am thinking for sure
1-"Drums and Wires" by XTC (this is so played out it is scratched and very messed up!)
2-Skull Kontrol called "Deviate by All Means of Capture" (this is being damaged as we speak as I just recently got it ...)
3-"Making Love" by Atom and His Package and "the Great Escape" by Blur (a tie both albums make me jump!)
JAN: I'm only emotionally attached to vinyl. CD's are too impersonal.
1)Lugworm-"te lo diro" 7inch (i'd be devastated if i lost this because their brief existence produced little more than this glimpse at brilliance)
2)the Fall- "Room to Live" (this was the first Fall album I was obsessed with)
3)Pulp-"everbody's problem/"there was..." (this is, i believe, their second single from 1983, i need this very rare artifact to prove to non-believers the longevity of their brilliance and their influence on Belle and Sebastian)

2)Winterbrief? - do you have an obsession with undergarments?
JAN: I think lots of people have an obsession with undergarments. Why else would there be such a lucrative industry which sells something that usually no one else but the wearer will see? I don't know why, but it always puts me a better frame of mind if I know I'm wearing nifty underwear.
JULIAN: Not in the least bit I even get grossed out by my own undergarments! :-( Hmmmm ...

3)Guilty pleasure?
JULIAN: This would have to be eating Lay's Sour Cream and Onion chips while listening to Candy-O or Panorama by the Cars or maybe any Duran Duran album. Cheesey is not the word when you start describing the music of the Cars or Duran Duran but I LOVE them anyways .... The spirit of Nick Rhodes and Simon Le Bon live on in my heart.
JAN: Um, I guess the Pet Shop Boys. I wish I could get the point across to music elitists that just because a band is top 40 doesn't necessarily mean that they have to suck. Every now and then mainstream audiences do get something right. Even their newest album is fantastic, how impressive is that?! Oh, my other guilty pleasure is relationship advice columns. My favorite is "Savage Love". It's what I look forward to most about Wednesdays.

4)Favourite "top 40" 80's song?
JAN:"West End Girls" of course! Oh, and Human League's "Don't You Want Me".
JULIAN: Okay there are a few like "A View to a Kill" by Duran Duran or "Shake it Up" by the Cars ... I am missing some I am sure ....

5)You have never been to Toronto before - in 10 words or less describe what you expect when you come to play here on the 7th?
JAN: I was told there are Chinese shops selling Dutch cheese.
JULIAN: A big city with lots to do but too little time!

6)Why should all the people reading this come to your show?
JAN: Julian might take off his clothes and he has a great ass.
JULIAN: We might just dance and start exposing ourselves after all we do use drum machines .... It won't be hard sequencing the whole show and putting it on dat tape! You will never know what to expect at a Winterbrief show we are moody and dangerous.

FEMBOTS
email: thefembots@hotmail.com WAVELENGTH #14 SUNDAY MAY 14, 11PM

Most of you don't know this, but I, Buddy Dovercourt, am an agent for CSIS.
I go around, looking into musical acts in Canada, trying to figure out if any of them are a threat to average Canadian life.
Make no mistake: the Fembots are a threat to the dull and predictable. I took the time one day to capture Mike of the Fembots and interrogate him:

CSIS: What are you doing here?
Mike Fembot: We're here to foil your evil plot and kill you in an unusual and possibly ironic way. Plus if we have time we'll make love to your women and get into some kind of car/ski/helicopter chase.

What documentation do you have?
A Grade 12 diploma and a licence to kill.

Who sent you?
We could tell you that but we'd have to kill you. Actually, we'll have to kill you anyway. I'll tell you what, if you reveal you evil master plan, we'll tell you who sent us, then we'll kill you.

Give me a list of your armaments.
Fisher-Price xylophone, pop cans, buzzerphone, lawnmower, fire alarm (safety first), tapeloops, balloons and spoons, plus the usual Super Car ('89 Crown Victoria station wagon) and exploding cigarette lighter.

Have you seen the film Cloak and Dagger starring Dabney Coleman? We have ways to get the truth.
I don't know what movie you saw but I saw Cloak and Dagger starring Henry Thomas (of E.T. fame). I also saw Maxwell Smart: The Nude Bomb and They Call Me Bruce in the theatre. Torture will have no effect on me.

Do you remember a collection of toys called the Power Lords, and if so, which was your favourite?
I can't remember the Power Lords, but I do remember He-Man and She-Ra, the Weebles, Barba Poppa, Big Jim, Hugo the Man of a Thousand Faces, and the Transformers. I also remember some type of horror kids toy that was a big plastic head full of green goo, but I can't remember what it was called. Of them I think the best have to be the Bible Heroes action figures that came out a few years ago (no joke). You could play Moses vs. the Egyptians or Old Testament vs. New Testament. Brian has a Lorne Greene action figure if that counts for anything.

FOLK FESTIVAL MASSACRE
web:http://www.highschoolchampion.com/folkfestivalmassacre.html WAVELENGTH #14 SUNDAY MAY 14, 10PM

Wavelength #14 features the debut of Folk Festival Massacre, the creation of Toronto artist, Alastair MacLeod. Alastair previously played in The Michael J. Fox Tribute Band and Toronto indie-rock veterans Neck. Wavelength correspondent Adam Rosen sent the email out.

Tell me about what the phrase "suffering for your art" means to you.
Alastair: "Suffering for your art" is an oxymoron because if you are making art you should be happy about it, but if it's cathartic then sometimes you inflict damage on all involved. That's the road to enlightenment - reaching a higher plane through punk rock.

Give me a brief history of how Folk Festival Massacre came to be.
Alastair: I wanted to pick up where I left off when I stopped playing in Neck. I was still writing songs and they were the same loud, fast, angst-ridden kind. I wanted to record some and was lucky enough to be able to find that a lot of people were interested in helping me out. Best of all, this is almost like the same band as before except there are only songs by me and there are two guitars instead of one -- and Dave plays bass (awesomely) and I play guitar (the roles were reversed in Neck). These guys can play really fast!!

Tell me a great story from the recording of Neck's legendary All September Long sessions.
Alastair: I know I was there but somehow it all seems to be a blur. I remember it was December and we were watching the track grinder spray sparks along the railway tracks from the studio window. I remember drinking Winter Brew. The studio was right near the Upper Canada brewery (R.I.P.) so we were never thirsty.
Dave: This led to absolute chaos - doing twenty takes of a song ("Hulk") and getting fifteen seconds into it at best, not remembering how certain tracks got done, etc.
Alastair: I think I was collecting unemployment at the time, so that really made it special. Everybody who was involved in recording that tape is playing on this new stuff.

If your songs were oil paintings, what types of images would you depict?
Alastair: Maybe the kind you see on those commercials on TV where they sell warehouses full of art. I am going through a Francis Bacon phase now but I don't know if these songs are in the same league. I like a guy named Patrick Caulfield, too. I like encaustics (painting with wax and oils). Actually, the closest would probably be those paintings by those gorillas and elephants in the zoos, except I think they use acrylics.

For you, what did Michael J. Fox represent?
Alastair: Michael J. Fox is still with us and he still represents the best Canada has to offer the world. I remember, at one time, he said he might run for prime minister -- it would be incredible. Canada could be back on the map in a big way. He could be like FDR -- a world leader rising above his disability.

What sort of environmental/psychological damage can we expect you to inflict upon those who witness your live show?
Dave: One of the missions of this band is to assault the audience's senses as much as possible. There will be much blood, sweat and tears -- of joy!
Alastair: I will spray blood on anyone who gets too close to the stage.

WAYNE OMAHA
WAVELENGTH #15 SUNDAY MAY 21, 11PM

Wayne Omaha Promoted to Higher State of Consciousness by Doc Pickles
It is with great distress that we announce the promotion of Dr. Mr. Rev. Wayne Omaha, Ph.D. MME., to a higher state of consciousness after 37 years ofdedicated service to the Sinphonic Corporation.

Dr. Mr. Rev. Omaha worked thanklessly like a dog fastening struts to the personal watercraft of the corporate floatation department, and also served as vice-chair of the annual staff picnic committee. His antics at last year's Christmas party will not soon be forgotten and the smell of brie in the photocopier will remain with us long after our memories fade.

When asked to comment on his promotion, Dr. Mr. Rev. Omaha would only say "sometimes you've got to take the stairs" before consulting with his attorney, Mr. Lawyer Sir Yawd LL.B., who added, "at no point did Dr. Mr. Rev. Omaha ever have designs on 'taking' said stairs per se, rather he was using those stairs as a metaphor to explain how he would commute to his nextassignment, namely to unquestioningly carry out the wishes of the Sinphonic Corporation, but in another dimension."

Shortly after beginning his ascent, Dr. Mr. Rev. Wayne Omaha disappeared in a flash of light never to be seen again to anyone other than operatives of the company and surviving members of his church, members of the independent rock'n'roll band "Wayne Omaha", who will relay the Dr. Mr. Rev.'s message of "beauty on"to Wavelength patrons on May 21.

His empty cubicle will be filled by Judge Yer Honour from the Compliance Department, who has been coveting the location for several years.

THE MOUNTAINSIDE BAND
WAVELENGTH #15 SUNDAY MAY 21, 10PM

HEART AND SOUL BROTHER NO.1:
an interview with the ubiquitous Dave Clark (serving on this occasion as proud representative of The Mountainside Band; form letter formed by Craig Fraid Dunsmuir).

Who all is in the Mountainside Band with you? How does it differ from your other projects (The Dinner Is Ruined Band, The Woodchoppers Association, Living Organism)?
The Mountain side band is Richard Gregory (guitar, vox) of the Lawn, Possum, Woodchoppers and West Hillbillies, Alfons Fear (bass guitar, vox) of Zebradonk, Woodchoppers and Klave Y Kongo, Blake Howard (drums, vox) of GUH, Woodchopper's and The Blake Howard Tribute Band, and myself (guitar, vox). The difference between Mountainside and all the other bands I play in is I'm not beating the love tubs. This means that I had to figure out what to do with my feet whilst Iwas endeavouring to wrangle with the six-string electrical twanger. The most obvious thing was dancing. It came as a natural byproduct of having the leg bones connected to the hip bones which are closely rooted in the penile bone! The other difference is that we are playing songs which for the most part were written by me and Richard in our respective homes. We brought 'em to old Fonzie and Blake where upon they applied their brand of magic to them. We sing a lot. The general approach is always the same: playing with love in our hearts.

One of the things about your musical personality seems to be your penchant for constant spontaneous collaboration. What do you look for when it comes to finding somebody to jam with?
When it comes to jamming I look for people who give me a good feeling in me belly. I'm confident that anyone who has the guts to be honest and play from their hearts is a person who can positively contribute to the betterment of this old world. As a result, I'm able to be in many different bathtubs with lots of different toys, soaps and scrub brushes with exciting people who don't mind my grey water. It's all good.

Do you think recent arguably increasingly conservative times in popular culture have/will serve(d) to strengthen grassroots art and music culture?
Artist will always act in accordance to their own will. (Conservative times signify a successful dumbing down of the populace based on the notion that Mommy and Daddy will take care of you as they will abuse you along the way. At which point your rewards will be a vacuous, unfulfilling and ultimately destructive material existance. It often breeds the "Fuck you Jack. I've got mine." attitude. Not at all for the common good. By defaultart makes a mockery of the absurdity of the conservative, the hate-filled, anti-intellectual, isolationist ignoramasses who seat and soil the seats ofpower and impotence in our country.) I've noticed that people are springing up everywhere with great artistic ideas. Improvised music is an all encompassing garden which is being tended, rendered, deconstructed and admired by people from disparate realms. Check out campus radio, local free music series and the cross-pollination going on in all music. Multi-media events are happening in this town all the time. You've just got to keep yourself posted. Better than that. Start one yourself! Any attempt to getsome honest artwork out into the public eye or into your life at home with the family or friends is for better. It beats apathy any time. Your art could be cooking, sex, gardening - whatever you have a passion for.

ARC
WAVELENGTH #16 SUNDAY MAY 28, 10PM

Arc are playing Wavelength #16. Here are questions and two Arc member's answers:

Noise vs. Music; The Random vs. The Specific; Art Vs. Pop: Please explain and relate to Arc....
Aidan: Okay, I'm going to namedrop right from the start: R. Murray Schafer (Canadian composer of 'new music') says"Noise is any undesired sound signal and I like that. Music (all art) is all in the intention; both of the performer/artist and the audience/consumer; a sort of symbiotic agreement to consider something that could be construed as noise in some situations as music because the performer presents it as such and the consumer agrees to listen to it as such. Pretty arbitrary, sure, but art is arbitrary. Or random... the random becomes specific. Which is what Arc is all about: taking random moments, random incidents of noise, and incorporating them into some sort of whole to create music.
Unspecified Arc Respondent: I think some of the best creative results come from introducing the element of randomness. Arc never practices, which allows this to happen during a show. The same with noise, it's inconsistent, always new and adds that element of surprise.

Name some non-music related things that have affected what you do.
We all do other things besides music. None of us are exclusive to one particular media. Rich and I write and Chris is a visual artist, and of course that affects what we do. In Chris' case, much of his visual work is tribally influenced and the sound he brings to Arc is also very tribal. I don't know if there are any actually, more drumming spawns new rhythms.....

Why "Arc", as opposed to, say, "Car"?
Um, well, "car" is kind of boring.... the word "arc" is more powerful than something like "car" or "rac" and I think it applies to us as a group symbolically, both in terms of the wide range of styles and musical interests we bring to the project and how we as a unit musically support each other. I think Arc is more abstract and open than Car, which has so many associations.

How do you entice people to your shows, or is this necessary?
A lot of people are intrigued by the fact that we improvise everything, which doesn't seem so common anymore (apart from the jazz world). This also means every show is unique, so it's not like going out to hear a band play their greatest hits. I think the idea of a spontaneous jam, and the diversity of instruments is what for me would peak interest.

If Arc could travel in time; what year would they choose and why?
Medieval times; good music. Though I have no idea what the other guys would think... Hmmm, ahead to the next gig, I'm looking forward to playing
Pick your favourite word or words that contain the letter sequence "arc". (Foreign languages are permitted but proper nouns are not.)

Arcana. Narcosis. Archetype.

- Paddy O'Donnell

MICHELLE MCADOREY
WAVELENGTH #16 SUNDAY MAY 28, 11PM

Folk, noise, pop and free improv collide on former Crash Vegas singer Michelle McAdorey's Whirl, recorded with guitar genius Eric Chenaux and Blue Rodeo's Greg Keelor and Glenn Milchem. The result is transportative.
What follows is a discussion between Michelle and Wavelength's Jonny Dovercourt, on the topic of transportation.

We hear you're an expert at hopping freight trains. Can you give our readers any tips?
I still haven't graduated to the expert status you refer to, but here are some of my observations: Kneepads - I never remember to buy these, maybe I think I would look too much like a roller-blader, but it sure would save the knees -- takes a while to manage a graceful and surefooted landing off of a moving train. Strong coffee and portable espresso maker with an extra cup or two for sharing -- when you happen upon a train engineer, nothing like the offer of a good cup of coffee establishes that you are riding as a friend and not a wanted fugitive and of course if you can sing a song or two - well you'll be given the secret handshake and keys to the private clubhouse, so if ever you're in the North stuck waiting in a blizzard or such.... you'll be fed homemade maple tarts and given a bed with a feather pillow.

Bike ride vs. road trip. Discuss.
I find night to be the best time to ride my bike in the city and I think a prerequisite to a successful road trip is firstly a tape deck(CD player) and a choice selection of recorded material and secondly, but harder to find, is securing a vehicle that has an amazing interior, with a well designed dashboard that has crazy lights and ledges for setting shit on -- in short, a vibe, and don't take a watch.

What was your worst experience on an airplane?
A man started to jerk off beside me (across the aisle) and I had laryngitis with a temperature of 104.

Whirl, your new solo album, was recorded at a farm. Can you tell us a funny story involving the trip there and back?
I can't remember at the moment, but if you listen close enough to "Morocco" you'll hear Greg Keelor pounding on some nuts, he was preparing his famous oatmeal almond raisin cookies for us.

Whirl's song titles are either names or places. List three places you've never been but would like to write a song about and why.
I don't think I'll know until it hits me, but I do want to take a Great Lake freighter up the St. Lawrence to Newfoundland and I wouldn't mind rafting down the Yukon River in Alaska -- check this out....